Okay, my incommunicado thing didn’t last that long … and it’s all Edie Ramer’s fault. She sent me an e-mail saying that she was giving me a shout-out overÂ on the romance writers’ blog Magical Musings.
So, I figured I’d better write something witty and funny and smart in case some folks surfed on over here.
But I’m not feeling very witty and funny and smart at the moment. I’m just trying to make it through New Year’s. And get the wrapping tape out of my hair.
So, I thought I’d share some of my survival tips for the holiday shopping season and those stress-filled Christmas gatherings.
1) Always carry candy canes in your purse. You know thoseÂ commercials where the guyÂ shoves a whole bar of chocolate in his mouth and mumbles something when his girlfriend asks him if she looks fat in those pants? Try using candy canes for the some purpose at holiday parties — avoidance. It is very difficult to badmouth your boss while you’re stuffing a candy cane in your mouth — even while tipsy. Of course, trying to eat said candy cane while you’re tipsy is a hazard all in itself, but it won’t get you fired.
2) Get your significant other the sweater you want him to have for Christmas. He probably won’t like it anyway, but at least you will.
3) Buy your significant other something that requires batteries or has electronic components, and he’ll love you forever, no matter what it is. Seriously. A flashlight that plays music. Power tools that plug into your computer. Thingamabobs that spontaneously produce electrical shocks whenever you try toÂ use them. Best Presents Ever for guys.
4) For the guys out there, do not buy your wife or girlfriend any household appliance unless she specifically asks for said appliace. Trust me on this. You do not want to give a woman expecting jewelry a toaster oven instead. Things turn … uglyÂ real quick. And usually involve multiple trips to the emergency room.
5) And THE golden rule of the holiday season … don’t buy it if you can’t take it back.
Alright, that’s probably about as much wit as ya’ll can stand for one day. Heck, maybe even the whole year. So, I’ll leave you with this piece of information –Â three weeks from today, it’ll all be over but the taking back part.
So, until then, eat something decadent, steal someÂ kisses under the mistletoe, and curl up with your favorite book.
Jennifer (who hopes to have the tape out by New Year’s at the very latest)